06/16/11

UP!  Mariano and Erika are gonna pick me up around noon.  In what?  What will they pick me up in you ask????  Oh, you know…just a jacked up TRUCK!!!  HA!  YES!!!!!  Yea, one of those that has a step so you can actually get into it!  DREEEEEAAAAMY!!!!  Good thang I was wurin’ ma’ boots!

I haven’t seen Mariano since…high school…which was…ugh…20 years ago.  Ouch!  20 years, man!  20 YEARS!  And he’s still the same!!!  Well, he’s not all lanky and skinny anymore since he’s a navy diver, but still crazy sweet and amazing.  So yea.  That’s real nice.  How come everyone I knew back then got all buff and stuff?  Kasper was the same way!  Where’s MY buff??!!  Tssssssss…I just seemed to have gotten more lanky.

We pull into downtown San Diego to get lunch and have to park in a parking garage.  See, usually Mariano is on his bike (motorcycle), so he doesn’t have an issue parking, but this truck can’t just randomly pull into some spot on the side of the road.  Oh.  And don’t forget that we’re in a jacked up truck…yea.  So we pull into a garage and we hit the 6’-8” height restriction with … something…meh?  Whatever, just do it.  The whole way up to the top the antenna decides to hit every carrying beam in the place.  Wow.  That’s embarrassing!  And we did get out and check at one point on the way back down.  We had at LEAST 4 inches from the top of the roof of the truck to the concrete beams of the garage.  Plenty of space!  WAAAAHAHAHA!

Lunch at TGIF with beer and talks and jokes and fun.  Erika recorded a ton of stuff…I’m not too sure I want to see it, but Mariano is a film editor too (in his spare time), so I’m sure it’ll be awesome!  Then we walk around a bit and go into this mall, which is unlike any mall us Eastern folk have been it!  It’s 3 floors and completely open to the elements!  WOW!!!!  There’s even a food court!  Craziness! 

Now we’re gonna go back to my hotel so I can grab my swimsuit and a change of clothes, because we want to go out dancing after we swim in the pool where Mariano lives! 

Pacific Beacon.  Military base.  I haven’t been on a base since 1993 and I just have to say that it feels like home.  I don’t know why, but just driving through the gate and then walking to the store…yea.  That’s home.  I probably should have joined the military, huh?  Naaaaahhhhh…that wouldn’t have been a good idea!  ;) 

But they’re all so YOUNG!  The GIs!  Were they always this young?  Is that dude even old enough to be buying beer??!!!  Oh.  Crap.  I’m getting old huh?  As a side note, I decided to wear my Army shirt this day.  Whoops!  Hey Amber!  How ‘bout you walk around a naval base with an Army shirt on.  Betcha you’ll make fast friends with that ‘un! 

So here’s the base and military housing.  Military house has changed a wee bit since I last saw it.  Yep.  It’s all purdy and clean and modern and they have a Subway in the building and a fancy lobby and roof top swimming pools and roof top jacuzzis…yea.  Changed just a bit from dorm room style housing for Gis.  We were gonna go swimming and hang out in the jacuzzi, but it seems as if everybody else had that same idea and there is no way in hell I am getting into my swimsuit and hanging around a bunch of Navy dudes.  Nope.  Nuh un.  Not gonna do it!  How about we just hang in your apartment (with a balcony) and have a beer and then go up to the pool and hang out there on the side (fully clothed)!  YAY!  I gots ta’ learn some Swedish too!!!  The sounds come from the back of your throat.  It’s difficult and it sounds like you’re saying the same letter over and over again, but they can tell the difference! 

It was an awesome day and night (nite and day cue:  Kid Cudi) other than the fact that those dudes have NO IDEA what good music is!  Tsssssss.  C’on now.  What is this slow bad R&B that you are playing??!!  OH!  Journey!  Ok, that’s fine…nononononono!  Don’t change it!  DAH!!! 

Mariano had 1 beer too many we think and there’s no way he is gonna drive me back to my hotel!  Nope!  Adventure to end the night?  Call a random cab, walk to the side gate, and drive to the hotel!!!!  Crush hug Mariano and Erika before you leave though as Mariano is informing the cab driver that he needs to treat me like royalty and that he will NEVER have someone more important in his cab.  Because he’s got Ambah D in the backset.  V.I.P. brothah!  (hearts)!!!!!! 

20 years don’t mean nuthin’ when you’re with crew.

06/15/11

Why are there no coffee shops in the rest of the country???!!!

I get to the desert around 10:30 am and find the ranger station.  Well, it’s closed but there are some kids working on pulling up plants nearby…can you tell me where the trail starts purdy please?  No one seems to know where the trail starts.  Really??  How is that possible?  Even if you are just volunteering, shouldn’t you know where the main trail is?  One of the kids tells me to go ask “that guy”.  I turn around, turn back to the kid and say…um…there ain’t no one there, hon.  Are you feeling ok?  AAAAHAHAHA!  Ok.  That got a smile.  Phew!  They are human!!!  The ranger tells me where the trail starts (oh and this ranger is maybe 21.  Maybe.)  I would like to be a ranger please.  He gets really excited that I’m going to hike it.  (snarf) perhaps they don’t get many hikers up here in the desert!

Here I am hiking and it’s flat and you have to walk around what is called “Hole in the Wall”.  I discover some wild animal poo!  YAY!  What is this??  It’s all braided and loopy and piled ever so neatly!  Hmmmmmm…I turn a corner and BAM!  The rock is AMAZING!  It’s huge and looks like swiss cheese!  WOW!  The trail leads right into the center of it!  Aweshum!  So I’m exploring all the little crevices and such and looking at all the birds flying in and out of the holes in the rocks up top when…I loose the trail…’cause it’s rock, see…and there aren’t any signs or apparent trails.  Ohhhhkay.  I’ll walk this way!  I know I have to loop aboot to get back to the ranger station which is this way…right?  Up some rocks, into this wee lil’ cavern area (I had to put my camera away because it was so small and I needed both hands) and then???  A WALL!  Kind of…with…metal loops sticking out from the side.  Oh.  Um.  Ok.  I see, it’s this kind of trail, huh?  Now I’m mountain climbing!  YAY!!!!  So it’s only like 8’, but it was AWESOME!!!  I got so excited!  Like a small child who just got to ride the tea-cups for the first time!  Luckily no one was there twirling me about!  That would have been difficult for climbing!  Now I’m in what looks like a real trail, still rock, but at least it looks like it goes somewhere…around this corner and dead end…with ANOTHER wall with metal loops!  AH!  UP! UP! UP!  Best hike EVAH!!!!  The most amazing thing about Hole in the Wall is that a volcano erupted 18 million years ago (8?)—well darn.  I’ve forgotten now, but I labeled one of my pictures with the correct date, so it’s somewhere here…18 or 8 million whatever it is, that sure was a long time ago!  Anyway!  This volcano erupts and ash goes flying everywhere…’cause it’s a volcano…them are big!!!  The lava stops a few miles from the Mojave Desert BUT!  The ash lands here…and…you should sit down now…the ash lands here at Hole in the Wall and FORMS THESE GIGANTIC FORMATIONS OF “ROCK”!!!!!!!!!!  WHA???!!!!  Yea, it’s true.  This is all ash rock stuff.  Unbelievable.  I just had to sit down again. 

Nature—you sure are mind blowin’!!!

Alright, so now I’m going to take the back loop in the desert to see the sand dunes!  Before I leave I ask the ranger what sort of wild animal poo it was that I saw.  (snarf)…wild COW!  HA!  Of course, Amber!  You take a photo of wild cow poops!  AAAHAHAHAHA! 

I’m following the map.  It’s easy see…it just does a loop that’s about 10 miles at most…driving on pavement…and then…there’s a gate (it’s open) and the road looks a bit different after the gate.  There are 3 men on the side talking and it looks like they are wearing official t-shirts so I stop.  I ask them if I’m on the right track here and if the road leads to where I wanna go.  Yep.  Just follow this road and take a left at the end.  You can’t miss it.  I look at the road and ask if my Element will be ok.  Oh, yea!  They just graded the road!  You’re all set!  Phew.  Thanks!

Alright now.  This you see is NOT a road!  It’s the actual desert and at parts, well wind happens and sand blows and GOOSH!  You’re driving on loose sand!  WHHHEEEEEE!!!  Which is like snow, really.  You just have to be aware and accommodate for the no traction part.  YIKES!  It’s ok.  Imma really wanting my Jeep right now though!

In the distance I see a huge brown thing.  Is it????  Naw, that’s just a water tower, it’s way too big to be…AH!  It IS!!!!!!  It’s a frickin’ WILD COW!!!!!!!!!!!!  Holy crap!!!  And he’s all big with horns, so I slow down to get him on video tape.  I should really get out of the car though so it’s not so bumpy and get a good shot of him.  Oh.  But now he’s staring at me…um…and this is the point where Amber thinks (and says on video), do cows attack?  Is he gonna rush my car?????  Why is he staring at me like that?!  AHHHH!!!  Ok, so I’ll keep driving.  AND WOW!  I just saw a COW!  In the DESERT!  WHA??!!  And…………MORE!!  There are like 20 of them all walking and eating and off the side of the road with no fence.  And poof!  They go down into a crevice which you can’t even see.  It looks all flat, but obviously there’s something there that dips down because all the cows have “disappeared”.  Oh, great.  Yea.  Now I sound like a completely crazy person with cows in the desert and them disappearing and…nooooooooo, they didn’t talk to me or fly over my car.  And yes, I’m hydrated and just had a V8 juice, so I’m pretty sure it was real.  Um……..yea.  Yes.  It was real, promise!  I’d tell you to look at the video as proof, but I just watched it and the “cow” looks like a bug smashed on my windshield.  Humph.  Well, you’re just gonna have to believe me.

And now I’m at the turn off for the sand dunes.  You thought that first road was bad?  This one you can’t drive over 5 MPH because it’s so frackin’ bumpy.  I get half way down the road and decide that since I saw the Great Sand Dunes in Colorado, I don’t actually need to be up close and personal with these.  So I turn around (barely), take a couple pictures and creep my way back to the paved road again.

I was just told (because it’s late June now) that if you climb up the sand dunes there, strip down to your birfday suit, and slide down, the sand dunes make this BOOMING noise as you go!!!!!!  WOW!  Wha??!!!  Ok, next time.  I’m totally doing that! 

Now?  San Diego!  GO!  Mariano Lorde lives in San Diego and since I missed Jose, I NEED to at least see Mariano!  I pull into a gas station and text him that I’m about ½ hour from the city!  Hold tight, Amber…let’s see what we can do.  So here I am sitting outside of a gas station having another tailgate party, which consists of me drinking Vitamin Water and eating a cheese stick, when I realize that the sun is getting pretty low and that there are an awful lot of big trucks just slowly going through the parking lot…um…ok.  I need to get out of here.  But before I leave I would really love it if one of you cruised by blasting Coolio’s Gangsta’s Paradise.  Please?  Yes?  HA!  YES!  There it is!!!  AAAAHAHAHAHA!  Aweshum!!!  K.  Bye!

8:30 pm:

Hotel Circle off the highway (oh, hey!  That’s convenient…betcha I can find a hotel here!).  Mariano and his wife, Erika are too tired to go out tonight, so we make plans for tomorrow.  Which is totally fine, since I hiked in the desert today and then drove to San Diego, so um…Amber is a bit “ripe” as they say and also tired. 

SAN DIEGO CALIFORNIA!!!  WOW!!!!!!!!!!

06/14/11

YAY!  UP!  And now to go to the desert!  Mojave Desert that is!  Yep!

Don’t get sidetracked though…with Bedrock.  Yes, as in Flinstones.  I guess it’s located in Williams, AZ about ½ hour from the Grand Canyon.  Who knew??  Five bucks to get in.  Done.

Oh.  Wow.  Creepy.  It’s this huge field with lifesize replicas of the Bedrock town including the homes of Barney and Fred.  Equipped with furniture inside the homes.  And you know that stuff you can buy at the craft store?  Yea, you know the stuff.  It comes in a spray can and on the outside it says “make it stone”!  I think maybe these folks bought out all of it!  EVERYTHING is coated in it.  Chairs, tables…who ARE you people??!!  It’s basically deserted here.  Luckily a family walked into the gift shop after me with their children.  Maybe they’ll come into this part with me?  Huh.

Envision Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Blair Witch, but with lots of sun and desert and heat…that’s what it felt like walking through this “town”.  Well, at least there were a lot of photo opportunities for me!  And goats!!!  They had 2 goats!  I so needed to steal them, but I couldn’t figure out how to get them out until the boy got so upset that he almost broke himself out for me!  I would like a goat please.  When I get back?  As a present for me?  Yes?  You will get me a rescued goat?  A gray one with big horns would be fantastic.  Thanks!  Ok, so after the dude who was watering the plants (??—um…it’s a desert dude) asked me if I wanted my picture taken with any of the stuff, I decided I should go.  Hmmmmm. 

I drive and drive and gets tired.  My destination point is Needles, CA (Rt. 66).  ANNNNDDDD!  Arrived!  It was a short uneventful day (except for the scary Flinstone village), but it’s hot.  I get a room at the Budget Inn—as a side note, if you see a sign for the Budget Inn, don’t stay there.  I have been to three so far and they have become progressively worse.  Motel 6 is the same price, but clean, so just stay in a corporate hotel or a mom & pop one off of Rt. 66.  Pass by Budget Inn.

6:00 pm:

It’s 106 degrees.  It’s 6 o’clock at night!  WHA??!!  I go to get beer at the gas station where I’m pretty sure the scary dude from Silence of the Lambs walked in to fill his travel container up with gas.  Yea.  That’s frightening when your back is turned and you here someone say “I just need to fill this up” in the voice of “she put’s it in the basket…”  UGH!  I just about turned and punched him in order to get away, boy, that would have been embarrassing, huh?  Stupid movies, making me all paranoid.  I don’t even have my night vision goggles on me!  GAH!  Ready to get back to the hotel.  And…as a side note:  If you see any sort of liquid on the road in the desert, please drive crazy slow.  Yea.  I hit a puddle.  WHA??!!  Where did this puddle come from??!!  And then proceeded to PEEL OUT of the gas station REALLY LOUDLY!!!!!!!  Not on purpose!  I drive like an old lady!  Sheesh!  It’s just all the oils and stuff collect on the road and once it gets wet, well, it’s like pure ice and then you hit dry pavement and your tires are wet and it makes this AMAZING sound like you are rehearsing for a part on Knight Rider!  Yep.  Whoops!