4.
Compliment each other. You think those pants make his ass look good? SAY IT! You think she looks hot in jeans and t-shirts? SAY IT! You think his greasy hands are amazingly sexy? SAY IT! You think she looks good after working in the garden all
day? SAY IT, goshdarnit!!!! None of us are mind readers
(unfortunately…OH! Unless you has
a superpower I don’t know about!!!), so you need to use your words. Please. This one is crazy important! Tell them you like to watch them when they walk over to get
a drink. Tell them their eyes are
amazing. Anything. You think it; you say it. Humans aren’t used to compliments
because we don’t give out enough of them…
And the best response when someone says,
“hey, I like your boots/eyes/dress/etc.” is: “HEY! I like
your face!!!” Try it! Not on everyone though…you’ll get too
many “friends” if you do this too much.
5.
Presents!!!! Yea!
PRESSSSSSENTS!!! We all
love them. Srsly! Birthdays, Christmas,
Anniversaries! BUT! The best time to give someone something
is whenever you feel like it! If
you walk by a flower and it makes you think of that person that is kind of
special in your life, pick it!
Give it to them! Put it on
their windshield! Place it on the
bar when they’re working! Did you
just clean your junk drawer out and you found some stickers that amazingly
cute? Why don’t you write them a
card and stick the sticker on it…then sneak it into their bag/refrigerator/
book/mailbox? What’s stopping you?! Or a random rock/leaf caught your
attention…pick it up! Hand it to
them! And this should happen all
the time…not just during the first few weeks or months that you’re smitten with
that person. ...did I just say
“smitten”?! What, are we courting
each other now?! BAH! ANYWAY! Giving that someone something is basically like giving them
a surprise hug. It’s something
that they weren’t expecting, which causes their brain to essssplode with endorphins!! Don’t be shy, don’t think about it,
just do eeeeeet! You won’t be
sorry. Pwomise!
6.
Play time!! Guys, come on now!
(NS)! If you know me, you
understand the importance of playing.
Sometimes I feel as if a 7 year old girl is living inside me, and that’s
OOOOOO KAY! Here’s a story:
I left work one evening and was on my way to visit my best fwend, when all of a sudden, half way there, I changed course and started heading to the swings…yea…big surprise there, huh? So, I started swinging and decided to let said person know where I was and that I was gonna be a wee bit late. He said, “OK! I’ll be right there!”
…and he showed up…and got on a swing…and started swinging with me. There are moments in your life that you will always remember, because all of a sudden something as “mundane” as playing on the swing sets becomes a pivotal moment. That time when he looked at you and said, “I haven’t been on a swing set in 15 years.”…and then he couldn’t stop smiling. That time when you looked at him and wanted to punch him and say, “stop being an ADULT so much!!!” Wait. Maybe I did do that…
Some people don’t want to sit around a table and drink wine and talk about philosophy/politics/religion/world affairs, some of us just want to play on the swing sets for an hour and THEN (maybe) talk about stuffs. Yea, we have mortgages, jobs, car loans, laundry to do, a kitchen to clean, a dog that needs to go to the vet (for a check up…nothing serious!), but once in awhile, humans need to stop. And play.
Also, wrestle and play fight. Remember that time when you used to get off of the school bus and the three boys who lived next door to you would wait and then throw small rocks at you until you started running? AND THEN, you would get your soccer ball out and kick it against the rock wall…inevitably it would fly over the wall and those boys would be there to steal it from you. So you would sit and wait patiently until they realized you weren’t going to chase them…then your soccer ball would come rolling back to you. You were 8. They had a crush on you; throwing rocks and stealing your soccer ball was the only way they knew how to tell you. And that’s ok! So, now that you’re 38…why would you stop? I mean, the rock throwing is just kind of dangerous now because we’re stronger and can actually aim, but give someone a piggy back ride! Play punch them (NOT in the solar plexus!!), pinch them on the back of the arm or the inner thigh, steamroll them in the grass while you’re looking at the sky! Life gets too serious sometimes, so it’s up to you to make it fun.
I left work one evening and was on my way to visit my best fwend, when all of a sudden, half way there, I changed course and started heading to the swings…yea…big surprise there, huh? So, I started swinging and decided to let said person know where I was and that I was gonna be a wee bit late. He said, “OK! I’ll be right there!”
…and he showed up…and got on a swing…and started swinging with me. There are moments in your life that you will always remember, because all of a sudden something as “mundane” as playing on the swing sets becomes a pivotal moment. That time when he looked at you and said, “I haven’t been on a swing set in 15 years.”…and then he couldn’t stop smiling. That time when you looked at him and wanted to punch him and say, “stop being an ADULT so much!!!” Wait. Maybe I did do that…
Some people don’t want to sit around a table and drink wine and talk about philosophy/politics/religion/world affairs, some of us just want to play on the swing sets for an hour and THEN (maybe) talk about stuffs. Yea, we have mortgages, jobs, car loans, laundry to do, a kitchen to clean, a dog that needs to go to the vet (for a check up…nothing serious!), but once in awhile, humans need to stop. And play.
Also, wrestle and play fight. Remember that time when you used to get off of the school bus and the three boys who lived next door to you would wait and then throw small rocks at you until you started running? AND THEN, you would get your soccer ball out and kick it against the rock wall…inevitably it would fly over the wall and those boys would be there to steal it from you. So you would sit and wait patiently until they realized you weren’t going to chase them…then your soccer ball would come rolling back to you. You were 8. They had a crush on you; throwing rocks and stealing your soccer ball was the only way they knew how to tell you. And that’s ok! So, now that you’re 38…why would you stop? I mean, the rock throwing is just kind of dangerous now because we’re stronger and can actually aim, but give someone a piggy back ride! Play punch them (NOT in the solar plexus!!), pinch them on the back of the arm or the inner thigh, steamroll them in the grass while you’re looking at the sky! Life gets too serious sometimes, so it’s up to you to make it fun.
7.
Vacation time. This is a tough one and some of you may not be comfortable
with it, but hear me out. You need
alone time. Really. You need time away from what’s familiar
to you. Your job, friends, family,
home, partner, streets, climate, way of life, and schedule. And I’m not talking about a weekend;
I’m talking about 2 weeks to 2 months…alone. Go someplace you’ve never been before…and go there without
any plans! ADVENTURE!!! You’ll be pleasantly surprised at what
you find…other humans…that have stories to tell you and will share their beer
with you (or humans that may try and break into your hotel room—always carry
mace!). I won’t go into depth
about the lone-vacation, because this entire blog was started because of what I
did 2 years ago…if you want to read about adventures, just start at the
beginning (May 2011), and you’ll learn.
Be alone. Be
uncomfortable. Spend everyday
wondering where you will sleep, if you’ll be safe, what you’re going to eat,
how to get from point A to point B…find YOURSELF, because we all know that if
you spend enough time with one human being, you begin to lose who you
are. It happens and it’s not a bad
thing, just…I don’t know…that person that’s in your life, they happened upon
you because they thought you were unique.
Keep it that way. Don’t
ever forget who you are, don’t ever let anyone tell you to stop, and don’t ever
let anyone change you. EVER.
