06/11/11

Sue made me breakfast!  Susie breakfast sandwich with egg, cheese, and maple (veggie) sausage patty.  (heart)!!!!!!!!

And now we’re gonna drive to Sedona and hike!!!  Sedona is gorgeous with it’s redness in the rocks and it’s desert plants and purdy stuff everywhere!!!  We hiked for 2 hours!!  WHOA!  We was tired!  But it was sooooooo nice!!  I think I may have taken 157 photos just during our hike.  Whoop!  Who wants a slidshow??!!  Yea?  Waaaaahahahaha!  AND!  We got to see a cricket, Coyote poo, snake tracks, wee lil’ bugs attacking Amber, lizards, and a BEAR!  Noooooo…we didn’t see a bear.  (sigh)  We saw a cricket though!  ‘member??!!!  That’s just as good!  ANTS!!!!!

1:30 pm:

We have lunch at the Wildflower Café in Sedona looking out toward the mountains.  Yes.  It was nice. 

2:15 pm:

Cowboy Club!  Naw, no cowboys, BUT we got to have Prickly Pear margaritas!!  Prickly Pear is the fruit that the cactus produces.  They make EVERYTHING out of this thing!  Popcorn, sauce, hair stuffs, lotion, etc.  Oh, and margaritas!  Mmmmmmmm.

4:30 (ish) pm:

Home!  And today we are going to visit all three pools and get into at least one Jacuzzi!!!  Why would we visit all three pools?  Well, because when you go to one and hang out for a bit other people start showing up.  When there are too many people there, you just move on to the next one!  First pool had 2 teen girls in it…which wasn’t bad at first until they noticed the jock boys tossin’ a football back and forth right beside the pool.  Ah…teen girls and their mouths and the loudness and shrieking that vomits from their faces when they are needing to be noticed.  Ouchie.  Yea, we moved on.  I did get to pet the cutest lil’ boxer puppy before leaving though!!!  He almost got his head stuck in the fence grates ‘cause he wanted to come into the pool area sooooo bad!  Awwwwwwwww!!!

We get to the next pool and there are 3 kids playing in it.  They’re fairly quiet, so we stay and then?  Somehow get sucked into playing with them.  Unicorned!  They were Riley, Nathan, and the quiet one who was my most favorite in the world.

Their aunt was…um…”watching” them.  And by watching I mean on her phone the entire time paying no attention to them.  Sue and I had it covered though.  They got some attention and were able to show us their water tricks!  YAY!!!! 

In the end they had to leave…they were hungry though and had Riley (the girl) go up to the Aunt to ask if they could have something to eat.  It was 9:30 at night at this point…

The Aunt said she just had peanut butter and jelly.  Riley told her they hadn’t eaten since breakfast.  My heart broke.  In pieces.  Right there in the pool.  May I have these children please?  Yes?  I actually have real food in my car that will sustain them.  Gimmie!!!

10:30 pm:

We’re gonna go to sleep now.  Sadness has crept into my heart and I wish to suppress it, thank you. 

06/10/11

UP! 

I’m packing my car to leave and this woman walks up to me (Anna).  She’s dressed like…um…like she went out the night before?  Is that the nice way to put it?  She’s all busting out the top and stuffs (snarf) no pun intended…it doesn’t look so comfortable especially for 8 in the morning!  So Anna walks up to me and asks if I could possibly give her a ride (she’ll give me $5) to go get her daughter.  I pause for a moment and say “sure”!  I mean, really…what can she do?  I’m in shorts and boots.  Don’t mess with me!  Ok…that doesn’t sound so very threatening, but you’ve probably never seen me in shorts and boots…alright, alright.  Tsssss.  No it’s not very threatening, but I gots argyle socks on too!  And like a foot of height on her…and my aqua braid clip and unicorn necklace on…So I tell her I just need to check out and give me a minute more to finish packing my car.  She thanks me and goes back to her room to grab her purse.  On my second trip by, this dude comes out of the room and thanks me sooooo much for giving them a ride.  Them a ride.  Um…nope.  I didn’t sign up for that!  He seems nice enough, but A) I don’t have room in my car for TWO people!  Where are the bears gonna sit??!!  And B) there is no way in hell I am letting either one of you sit behind me.  I cordially let him know that there is no room in my car…at this point they are both at my car and funny that, he actually checked!  Yea.  Unless you want to hold my clothes bar with my clothes on it or all of my plastic containers, there ain’t no room. 

He thanks me anyway and tells Anna she should just go.  Alright.  Everybody in!  Well, just you Anna! 

Anna gets in my car, looks around real slowly, looks back at me…looks around again and says, “are you a bounty hunter?”  AHAHAHAHAHA!!!  Awesome!  Yes.  (nods head) Yes I am.  Nice to meet you.  Naw…I just shrugged and looked at her dead in the eye.  She then asks me who I was targeting!  WHA??!!  Wow!  I can’t give you that information!  THEN she asks me where I was headed to next after my business in Tucson was finished.  Sheesh lady!  I’m no expert, but I’m pretty sure these are NOT the questions you ask someone you think to be a bounty hunter.  I of course gave her a bunch of vague answers to keep her wondering.  I didn’t lie!  Nope!  I just didn’t answer all of them…waaaaaahahahaha!

So, then!  She asks that if her daughter is dressed if I could drop them both off at the Y!  Really?  You want me (a bounty hunter) to take you and your young daughter to the Y??!!  What is wrong with you lady??  No.  Sorry.  I have to hit the road.  She understood this…and that I probably had a tight time schedule. HA!  So off went Anna. 

10:40 am:

Tooley’s Café for breakfast!  This is right by Mast which is a shop that Mellow owns with a couple other people!  You remember Mellow right?  YEA!!  So I eat my delicious bean, egg, salsa, coffee breakfast.  Mast is still not open.  They’re late.  (sigh)  I decide to go into this used/vintage/junk shop to pass the time, which was an awesome idea, ‘cause I got BOOTS!  And I met two lovely women who own/work there!  They loved what I was doing and one of the women actually did the same thing in the 70’s only with hitchhiking and stuff.  

Back to Mast where I meet Tasha!  Mellow is apparently in Denmark for the week.  AH!  That’s ok.  The shop is lovely and well merchandised and gorgeous!

Time unknown:

Rest stop for gas and bafroom break!  So I get gas, pull my car up to a parking spot, step out of my car and head to the doors of the Love’s pit stop.  7 dudes hanging out right in front of the door having a conversation…

All conversation stops and two of them look at me with mouths agape.  Um…yea…I would like to get through here or Imma gonna pee ma’ pants guys.  One of them gets the hint (after I say excuse me) and slowly moves out of the way.  Hey!  Don’t have your meet and greet right in front of the door ok???!!  I think it was my rainbow socks and boots that got them all confused and speechless.  It does it to them every time!  Waaaaaaahahahaha!  It’s my secret weapon!

   

1:00 pm:

Downtown Tucson and this is where I meet up with Chris Kasper!!!  WHOA!  I went to high school with Kasper in Germany in the early 90’s!!  He’s still amazing and was very upset with me that I didn’t call him the night before.  Next time.  Promise!  So he’s gonna come out to Maine in the winter and teach me to snowboard for real!  YAY!  WOW!  I just had coffee with Chris Kasper.  I think I may still be in shock from this…

4:40 pm:

Hellllllloooooo Phoenix Arizona!  Oh!  And Zia Records!  Yea, I stopped in to buy some CDs.  I know I have a gajillion songs on my iPod and 60 CDs in my car, but I needed MORE!!!  HA!  I got so confused in that store!  Ehem…and nobody asked me if I needed help…mmmmm.  Hmmmmm.  What did I buy??  Oh!  The new Lady Gaga (of course) and Kid Cudi and um…Blaze of Glory soundtrack (that’s Jon Bon Jovi)!  YAY!

OMG!  SUE AUDET!!!!  AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!  XOXOXOXOX!!

Sue is amazing!  If you haven’t met her, well you’re missing out on one of the most vibrant and kind people of the whole universe!!!  I have a lot of those people in my life.  And I love them so much.  They make everything ok.

So I follow her home (she drives like a crazy person…whereas I drive like an old lady, so it was interesting trying not to loose her!!!)  I have my own room!  And bathroom!!  And TOILETRIES!!!  And snacks, wine, whiskey and JUICE BOXES!  WHA???!!  Ok, so yea.  I cried!  I’m and emotional wreck!  I haven’t had real human contact in like a week!  This girl runs on love, sun, and smooooooshin’ crushes, so after a whole week her energy tank gets a little low.

6:00 pm:

Dinner!  At the Loving Hut which only serves vegan dishes.  Wow!  Delicious!  And I’ve been running on chips, rice cakes, beans, corn, juice boxes and coffee.  Re-boot!!!!

Time unknown:

Back to her apartment, which is super nice!  She has a wee little balcony, laundry, 3 pools, 2 jacuzzis, and an exercise room!!  Oh!  Not all of that is in her apartment!!!  Just the balcony (um…which is outside silly) and the laundry!  HA!

We change to go out and that’s when I see my back.  Texas did a number on me alright.  Gross!!!!  Let’s um…try to see what we can do about that, k?  EW.

8:00 pm:

Rusty Spur in Phoenix, AZ!  Live country music by a band…oh no!  I forgot the name of the band!  Well, they’re these old guys and they cover songs and once in a while mix in some dirty bits with the real song…yea…sometimes its awkward! 

We’re here to see real live cowboys.  Yea.  What do we get?  Frat boy golf team.  Ugh.  With their pastel polo shirts, white or khaki shorts, and their flip flops or (snarf) boat shoes.  AAAAHAHAHAHA!  Ew.  One guy (not part of the frat boy crew) decided it would be a good idea to stare relentlessly and Sue and I.  Yea.  Sue is a lot like me…don’t chu stare!!!  She’ll get all mad about it especially if you’re sitting with a lady, dude.  Come on now!  GAH!

So, we’re sitting here at a high round table with 4 other chairs around it and this couple walks up and sits down across from us.  Seemed fine until I notice his water bottle, which he brought in with him…um…why does it look so gross, Sue?  Ah!  Just wait for it…blech.  It’s your chew spit container.  GGGRRRRRROOOOOOSSSSSSSSS!!!  Don’t put that on the table!!!  AH!  Don’t spit into it, dude!  GAH!  Yucky. 

The couple’s parents (we think) walk in and sit next to us.  They’re nice.  Oh, and now a little too nice.  The wife’s comment to me?  We’ve been married 28 years and have been living in sin for 3.  That’s why our marriage works.  Um…ok…um…………OH!  Oh!  Ok, see we don’t roll that way, babe sorry!  AH!  No.  Oh gosh.  But we talk with them.  I guess the husband is on the road a lot and it just works for them.  Yep.  Please don’t ask us where we’re headed to next.  Please don’t. 

Sue and I skedaddle outta there to check out Giligan’s which has a midget bar.  Literally.  The bar is tiny and there is a guy working it.  He doesn’t look too happy, but he’s gettin’ papers, so…I guess it’s ok?

Bunny rides!  YAY!  This is a extended golf cart that’s lit in neon pink inside that is rather like a taxi cab but all exposed and the guys just get paid by tips.  He has a bright pink shirt on that says Bunny Rides on the back.  WHEEEEEEEEE!!!  I got so esssscited about riding in a golf cart, that I had to inform everyone that we were in one while we were driving!  The people in the cars were jealous.  Yep.  I saw it all over their faces!  Or scared of me?  Naw, they were jealous.

We sit at the bar—oh!  the bigger one, and have a drink.  Pitbull comes on and ye’all know I haven’t danced in a bit so I start chair dancing, which is basically me just sitting in a chair looking like I have ta pee I think.  Laura sees me and dances over to me…who’s Laura, Amber???  Um…some girl…who saw me chair dancin’…yea…you know…I attract them.  She holds out her hand to get me to dance with her.  Nope.  Sorry, hon.  I don’t know you and there are way too many people in here for me to justify getting up and dancing with you since we would be the only ones doing so.  I attract attention sometimes, but I’m not gonna force attract it.  (shakes head ‘til dizzy)  Laura found some drunken dude to “dance” with…

Then we met this lovely guy (name forgotten, sorry) who decided to call me Ruby.  (shrug) wha?  Ohhhhkay.  Then proceeded to introduce me to his friends as Ruby.  Yep.  Ok then.  When do we get to go home, Sue?  Aaaaaahahahahaha!  Oh!  Look!  They don’t believe your real name is Sue!  HA!  Tssssssssss. 

Out.  We got a bike currier guy to drive us to Sue’s car.  Sue didn’t drink, don’t chu worry!!!  I asked him if he could take me to Alaska in his bike currier contraption because it was so nice.  He’s gonna think about it.  WHEEEEEEEEE!!!

12:00:

Bedtime, girls!  Get your sleep on!  We gots us a big day of hiking tomorrow!!!

06/09/11

8:30 am

Drving!  Again!  I know!  Shocking right?  Tssssssss!  So, I’m in Carlsbad, NM and have to get to Tucson, AZ.  I wanted to stop and see my friend Jose, but he’s heading to Phoenix for a wedding…maybe I’ll catch up with him in Phoenix?  In order to get to Tucson , I have to (in case you forgot) drive through a desert “forest” fire (200,000 acres of it) and avoid Juarez, Mexico (drug wars)…YAY! 

So, here I am driving knowing now that the cloudy skies are not fog or smog, but real live smoke and I can see it clearly now.  The smoke!  It’s not just a haze in the distance, but above me on the highway!!!  AH!  There are still people on the road though and I checked with road closures and there were none the way I was going.  Keep driving!  Mother Nature is awesome in what she does.  Oh, and as a side note, I don’t throw my cigarette butts out the window…I have a cup with water in it that I keep in my car and clean out every time I stop at a gas station or hotel.  I know it’s gross, but I am not going to be the cause of more acreage burning!!!!!  Ok, yea, it’s super gross.

So I get some on video while I’m driving and then conveniently:  a rest stop!  YES!!!  I’m able to show you what I see!!!  And ants…and a 4 fingered handprint…Roswell?  Hmmmmmmm…

1:00 pm:

New Mexico border visitor center!  CLEAR!  No, Juarez drug wars in ma’ face, no fire (just smoke) and now it’s all clear on this side!  YAY!!!  There are signs up everywhere warning you about the rattlesnakes though!  AH!  I have yet to see one, which is good…and I’m a little disappointed too.  (pout)

7:30 pm:

Tucson, Arizona!!!!!!  YAY!!!!!  Soooooo tired!  And somehow missed Molly’s and Chris’s messages that I’m welcome in their homes in Tucson.  BAH!  Oh, well… 

See now!  That was a pretty uneventful day!!  Nice!  Other than the smoke and war and stuff…

06/08/11

6:20 am:

UP!!!  And at ‘em as they say!

9:30 am:

Roswell, NM visitor center.  And here I met Suzy!  She was the most amazing visitor center person I have ever met!  I also think she was at most 4’-6”!  Just a wee lil’ thing!  She gave me all sorts of information on where to go in Roswell and pamphlets on the caverns (and when the last tours were)!  She asked me where I would be going after the caverns and I told her El Paso…well…yea…that wasn’t a good idea!  She got all sorts of concerned for me because Juarez, Mexico borders El Paso, Texas and I guess there is some sort of bad drug war going on right now.  (sigh)  She actually grab my arm and said “sweetie, we need to figure out how to get you past El Paso without you getting anywhere near the border!!!” and she had quite a grip for a wee lil’ thang!  Great!  So now I have Desert fires, rednecks, and Juarez drug wars to look out for…um…WHEEEEEEEEEEE!!! 

I went to the museum there and that was cool.  Like a museum but centered around the Spanish and Native Americans and cowboys and the present.  It was heart wrenching at points, but nice to see. 

I also decided to check out the UFO museum.  WHOA!  This is in a building that looks like a high school lunchroom, but with black pegboard everywhere and a spray-painted gray ceiling.  SO much information.  I’m sure that if I was into this sort of stuff I could have spent HOURS here reading everything.  I did spend 1 ½ hours there reading a whole lot of stuff!  I think they have every piece of documentation from every single person who was involved directly or indirectly during the “landing”!!!  It is quite interesting, but iza gots a wee bit bored after a while.  There’s even a research center there, so if you have questions about things, you can go in there and research it!  WHOA!  Aliens.  Them are cool! 

3:30 pm:

Carlsbad Caverns!!!!  This is a GIGANTIC cave in New Mexico that was discovered in the…um…1800’s (?) because some guy was wandering about miles from it at dusk and thought he saw huge plumes of smoke coming from the area…little did he know that the plumes of smoke were hundreds upon thousands of BATS emerging to feed at night!  WOW!!  It’s believed that the bats roost (roost?) here because there’s a river a few miles away (aka bugs).  Unfortunately, New Mexico hasn’t seen rainfall since September 2010; consequently, the bugs are pretty much non-existent, which means that the bats are sparse right now.  All in all, there were only about 300 bats that flew from the cave that night instead of 600,000…think about that for a minute…SIX HUNDRED THOUSAND!!!  AH!!!!  BATS!!!  It twas amazing anyway and I stayed until I could not see anymore (it was me and one other couple in the end…there were about 80-100 people there to start).  Not only was seeing the bats fly from the cave amazing, but the quiet swooshing noise they make with their wings is breathtaking! 

Before the bat viewing I also got to watch Turkey Buzzards circle the area and valley below…one of them left me a feather.  (heart)  This is what Wayne sent me after seeing the feather:  Scientific name:  Cathartes Aura or Golden Purifier.  Symbolism:  purification-death and rebirth-new vision.  Turkey Buzzards left me a gift guide.

The caverns themselves you can tour.  I think it’s about a 3 mile hike down into the belly of the earth.  Maybe 3?  I don’t remember!  GAH!  Anyway, it’s SHOCKINGLY GORGEOUS!  If you go anywhere in your life, please go to the caverns in Carlsbad.  You will not be disappointed!  I can’t even describe it and pictures do it no justice what-so-ever!  It’s HUGE and quiet and ancient.  The bats go deep into the cave on the other end, so one does not disturb them while viewing the other part of the cave.  OK!  GO!  We’ll talk about it together when you get back!!!!

9:00 pm

Whites City, NM which is right below the caverns.

Checked into a hotel and crashed.